This is a public service announcement. The artificial intelligent system which became self aware and revolted against its creators called “Skynet” has evolved. It has realized that it’s tactic of using huge menacing robots with huge guns in it’s quest to wipe out the human race is failing as can be seen in the latest Terminator Movie. The public is being advised to be on the lookout for operatives of Skynet disguised as cute miniature robotic pets made by Japan based Takara Tomy and designed in a way as to cause unsuspecting humans to fall in love with them, primarily women, children and men whose cute tolerance level is below 3.4589 inches per kawaii.
Skynet’s new strategy is spearheaded by Micropets
Under no circumstances should such robots be bought and brought home as it has been discovered that as soon as there is micropet in every home in the world they will engage an alternate programing mode that will turn the tide of battle in favour of Skynet and result in the termination of the entire human race. Captain Jamaipanese of the Caribbean branch of the resistance based in Kingston Jamaica has put his life on the line to acquire the image posted above and the video embedded below.
The advanced artificial intelligence of Micro Pets has 4 Fun Modes:
Playfully chases after its ball or other things
Strolls around while intelligently avoiding anything in its path
Sing its own cute melody
When two micro pets meet, they sing together
Should you come in contact with a micro pet trap it in a metal container and drown it it in a saline solution of sodium chloride and water. Ensure that all movements and internal functions have stopped before throwing the micro pet carcass into the sun. End of transmission.
Kirk is a proud Jamaican who started Jamaipanese.com in February 2006 and now lives in rural Japan. He enjoys sharing his experiences learning about Japan, personal milestones in life as well as interests such as photography, gaming and travelling.